Note: This is a rant. If you do not have the energy for this, just close your tab and keep what is remaining of your sanity. You don’t want to lose that to my ridiculous analogies, do you?
“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”
Bruh.
I don’t want to settle for the stars; I want the moon. Problem is, I’m not alone. Most people I know are competing for the moon.
Yeah, I know that’s how ambition is supposed to work. But what is ambition, exactly? Is it meaningful? All of us are “defined” to have the same endpoint, the paths we take are different. However, at some point in life, most of us fall prey to the fallacy that success is the endpoint, not death. As the definition of success is subjective, we end up thinking that we all have different endpoints and different paths. What definition of success is better than the other? If my definition of success is the same as yours, whose path is better? At the end of the day, it’s all a competition.
I am not going to talk about this from a moral high horse. I know for a fact that my ambition has cast a shadow upon my entire personality for at least the last seven to eight years. A “happy ending” is all I want as well - it’s also what all of my friends want, albeit our definitions are different.
Coming back to our quote: if the definition of success is subjective, then there must be multiple moons. The earth only has one moon - but I’m sure not everyone wants to be a pure mathematician like I do, hence there can’t be only one “moon”. According to NASA, Saturn has the highest number of moons: between 63 to 83. I’m sure there aren’t just 83 different definitions of success on this planet, that would be ridiculous!
Notice that I vaguely said:
However, at some point in life, most of us fall prey to the fallacy that success is the endpoint, not death.
What is this “point in life”? The most common one would be the end of high school: when everyone competes to get into a top school. In senior year, we are not on earth, but rather on Neptune or Uranus: competing to invade one of fourteen or one of twenty-seven celestial bodies.
The endpoint we make such a big deal about lasts a measly four years. We believe we reach our endpoint at just 21-23. The global life expectancy averages to about 72.6 years.
So are we trying to say that we are reaching the “end” when we are barely done with one-third of our life?
The endpoint fallacy (ok, if this already has a name, and you know it, please DM me on Discord) ends up being quite dangerous. Maybe a few years later, people will think their first endpoint is when they are 6 years old (I would bet that’s already the case for a few people).
Personally, I believe that the distance between one’s birth and their first “endpoint” is shortening because people are victims of oversimplification. Once the first hurdle is crossed, the others must be comparatively easier to cross. Realistically, that’s not the case, is it?
Now again, let’s go back to our analogy: putting this observation back into our quote, we are basically saying that the distance between our “moons” and our hypothetical planet is shortening over time. What’s that the recipe for? A crash, of course!
Needless to say, that means something bad could happen - if one ends up thinking that their first “endpoint” is very close, the only thing motivating them is the endpoint. It’s the same reason you procrastinate finishing homework for less intriguing classes - the only thing motivating you is a deadline. We would live in a world where the only thing motivating people is the “endpoint”. We would end up with a generation of people who are short-sighted and physically incapable of long-term planning.
I would argue that would be an overgeneralization. Take me, for example - the reason I want to go to my dream school is because I believe it would truly pivot my ambition to be an academic researcher. I fully recognize that it is just one step toward a long-term goal, but I think that my goal can only be achieved by the snowball effect, it is all about the buildup. If I do one thing right, it could help me do the next step right.
As a child, when you learn how to count numbers, you initially think there are only ten numbers. There are only that many you can count with your fingers, not to mention you have limited knowledge.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, and then ten. We all know the drill.
What if I counted one, nine, and ten?
I got to ten at the end. I may have skipped over two, three, four, five, six, seven, and eight. But I got to ten. Sometimes, that is all that matters. Skipping over those numbers didn’t mean I won’t get to my “goal”. It just meant the distance between a few steps would be longer. However, the distance between my starting point and endpoint still remains constant!
Similarly, if I tripped up on one part of my “plan”, that doesn’t mean I won’t reach my end goal.
Say I counted till five perfectly. Does that necessarily mean I can count to ten? No, it doesn’t.
So if I have not tripped up on the way so far, does that mean I won’t in the future? Of course not.
However, I (and many others) seem to think that tripping up along the way implies failure. That is not true - and there is ample evidence to support that. Why are we all repeatedly falling for the same trap, then?
I do know that some of us seek escape and comfort in our success. Working toward success can sometimes be a coping mechanism, and celebrating success gives you fewer reasons to have to “cope” in the first place. The faster we can have the “ultimate success”, the better. It’s a drug we’re all chasing.
Quite obviously, it was my issues with uncertainty pertaining to college decisions that inspired me to type up this post. It is hilariously hypocritical that I even explained all of this, but oh well, this is why it is a rant, I suppose.
During this… help-I-have-no-words-to-describe-this period, I notice that my state of mind has been in a constant state of flux. For a few hours, I wonder if my future deserves me, and in the next few hours, I question if I deserve a good future.
Troubling(?) yet eventful times. I am sure we’ll get through this (on that note, if you would like any self-made college app-themed memes, DM me on Discord).